GorillaOffTopic, Everything But Gorilla Trades

Here’s a very real scenario: a man in his 20’s finds out he has cancer. He decides to freeze his sperm knowing that chemotherapy could very well kill all of his sperm, thus eliminating the possibility of ever having children in the future. Now, more than 20 years after the cancer is gone, after years of being single and sterile, he marries and impregnates his new wife with said 21 year old sperm. Incredible, miraculous and very real.

The baby which resulted is now just one month old, but the history of her existence goes back over 20 years. Ken Decker is now in his 40’s, but at age 24, he found out he had Hodgkin’s disease. And yes, at the urging of his wise mother, he froze some of his sperm. Ken went about living his life in the years that followed not really thinking too much about his decision until one day when he met the love of his life, he knew that decision could pay off. He never knew back when he made that decision it would be one of the best and wisest moves he would ever make.

 Ken and Michelle Decker now have a beautiful baby named Madison, and the amazing thing is that the 21 years between Ken’s freezing his sperm and Madison’s being born is one of the longest periods of time for conception on medical record. Ken says the decision to freeze his sperm was a case of “mother knows best.” “It was a mom decision,” he said with a laugh. “I was playing, scuba diving, chasing a career, and mom was like, ‘You have to bank your sperm.’ I said, OK. I did what Mom said to do.” 

But it would be a difficult undertaking for Ken and Michelle since frozen sperm is not always viable. In fact, the technology to find a viable sperm didn’t even exist when Ken decided to have his sperm frozen back in the late 80’s.(Man have we come a long way!)  Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection — ISCI for short is that technology. It consists of finding one good sperm to implant into one good egg rather than using an entire banked sperm reserve to bombard an egg. This technique has dramatically raised the pregnancy success rate, and Ken and Michelle credit the technology for their new daughter.

However, it wasn’t an easy road for them. It took 3 long years and 3 failed attempts to get pregnant and on the fourth try they were at last successful. And, almost $90,000 later and they have their little miracle, Madison. When asked about how he liked being the record holder for longest amount of time between having sperm frozen and conception, Ken laughs and says “It’s really exciting. I hope no one beats us out.” Now, if they could only perfect the technology to include gorillas. Don’t laugh! We are an endangered species after all!

Due to the state of the current economy, now is probably not the best time to run away and just forget it all. After all, most of us don’t have a lot of money to burn right now. But then again, if we all lose our minds, there will be no money at all so what the heck? Go ahead and run away. Far, far away to a beautiful mountain resort, where fall has arrived and beautiful change has ensued. That is the theme of this new election is it not? So a change may be just what the economy doctor ordered for those of us who are stressed to the max these days.

Yes, fall has arrived once again as we knew it would, and though it’s arrival is hardly a surprise, the magnificence of its beauty never ceases to amaze those who are lucky enough to gaze upon it. So gaze upon it the Gorilla shall, as he embarks upon a tour of the beautiful country we call the U.S.A. and some of the very best places to enjoy the onset of autumn.

For some of the best fall scenes, Vermont is always on the list of best places to visit to take in the burnt orange, reds, yellows, and purples of the age-old maples and oaks. Manchester Village is the destination, with its gorgeous Green and Taconic mountain ranges; you simply cannot go wrong in this pristine place that takes you back to the 1700’s, with its gorgeous inns and B&B’s situated on some of the most unique mountain views the U.S. has to offer.

And one can never get enough of Aspen, Colorado. With some of the most sunny and crisp weather during the months of September and October, the Aspen Mountain range offers not only beauty, but a wide variety of activities like biking, hiking, and fishing and a range of fragrant smells that make you feel incredible and alive once again. But get there before October ends since the fall here is short-lived and the leaves will quickly drop off the trees as winter arrives early here.

Another wonderful treasure worth checking out is the lovely Asheville, North Carolina. With absolutely breathtaking views of the surrounding sycamores, hickories, oaks, and pines that look out onto the Blue Ridge Mountains- there is nothing quite like this view.

And why not take in the sights at White Mountain National Forest, located at the beautiful Mount Washington Resort in Bretton Woods, New Hampshire.  Mt. Rosebrook—and its maple, oak, beech, and poplar is right in the backyard of this majestic resort and the scenery does not disappoint.

Yes, whether you choose the awesome Blue Ridge Mountains, the amazing Rockies, or the gorgeous waters off coastal Maine, now is the time to just escape and indulge yourself in the glorious fall whether. No matter what your current state of mind, or level of economic-induced stress, the magnificence of the autumn season will relax you, revive you, and give you hope that perhaps a new season is upon us at last. Enjoy!

Is it true? Are Ben and Jerry’s and other ice cream chains considering using human breast milk rather than cow’s milk in their ice cream? Oh Geez, say it ain’t so!

It seems that PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) is the one making the suggestion to switch. The Gorilla is all for the efforts of PETA and organization like it, but is this really a plausible solution to the poor treatment of cows and their calves? Why not monitor the dairy farmers and make them STOP treating those poor animals badly? Why not send in spies to do random checks to make sure no one is abusing these innocent animals? Is the suggestion to stop using cow’s milk altogether really the answer? Aren’t we always going to have a need (or at least a desire) in this country to consume milk products from cows? Hmm.

It is a strange suggestion to say the least. Would you want to consume some strange woman’s breast milk in your ice cream or dairy product or AS a dairy product? Many people would not. But PETA wrote a letter on Tuesday to company founders Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, telling them that cow’s milk was potentially hazardous and that milking them is cruel. “If Ben and Jerry’s replaced the cow’s milk in its ice cream with breast milk, your customers — and cows — would reap the benefits,” wrote Tracy Reiman, executive vice president of the animal rights advocacy group. Ashley Byrne, a campaign coordinator for PETA, acknowledged the implausibility of the switch saying, “We’re aware this idea is somewhat absurd, and that putting it into practice is a stretch. At the time same, it’s pretty absurd for us to be drinking the milk of cows,” she said. But Ben and Jerry apparently are not too fond of the idea calling it “ridiculous to even consider.”

“We applaud PETA’s novel approach to bringing attention to an issue, but we believe a mother’s milk is best used for her child,” spokesman Sean Greenwood said in an e-mail. Although the Gorilla acknowledges that certain animals need to be protected, he doesn’t think this would solve the problem of abuse in farm animals. Good try, PETA but can we all give a collective EWWW, followed by a sigh of relief? The Gorilla will take his ice cream sans the breast milk please!

The Japanese, as we know, are the undisputed leaders in the world of technology. They are known for being way ahead of the curve on almost everything technology. For example, Japanese phones are by far, the most sophisticated phones in the world offering standard digital TV, music players, GPS, cameras that double as bar code scanners, and wireless credit cards. That is absolutely amazing- but wait…there’s more!
 
How bout’ a cell phone that can also unlock the doors of its owner’s cars and let them start their engines, without using an ignition key? Yes, this is the new Japanese technology built by Sharp Corp., which uses a technology originally developed by Nissan Motors, called “Intelligent Key.” It allows users to enter and start their cars without removing their keys from their pockets. The unique technology works when cars, which are equipped with the system, sense when the correct key is nearby, thus automatically unlocking their car doors.
 
Once the key is brought inside the car, the engine is automatically started. The technology is nothing new and has been available in cars for several years, but until now, it was never offered in a phone. The service will work using Japan’s largest mobile operator NTT DoCoMo Inc. This cool new technology will be displayed next week  at CEATEC, a major technology conference in Tokyo. Nissan has shipped about a million cars with the technology since 2002.

Gas prices, food prices, compounding debt, job losses, and the list goes on. And so does the accompanying stress. Everywhere we turn, there is stress. The stock market, the gas stations, the food markets, the now quiet shopping malls. It seems there is no way to escape it. When all of that stress builds and builds, humans can often snap.

Although most Americans seem to be handling it okay, according to an Associated Press-AOL Health Poll, between 10 and 16 million people who took the survey reported that they were “suffering terribly” due to their debts and the stress of the overall economy. People who have a lot of debt reported having stomach ulcers, panic attacks, headaches, neck aches, and backaches.

Paul J. Lavrakas, a research psychologist and AP consultant, who analyzed the results of the survey, says that those who reported a lot of debt-stress had at least 3 stress-related illnesses. That finding is supported by medical research that has linked chronic stress to a wide range of ailments. And unfortunately, the current tough economic times isn’t exactly helping the situation.

In fact, according to that same poll debt-stress is up 14% this year. With a slumping housing sector and rising costs, debt and it accompanying stress will only get worse. Revolving consumer debt, almost all from credit cards, now totals $957 billion, compared to $800 billion in 2004, according to the Federal Reserve. Wow! Lavrakas says that it isn’t known whether or not stress is in fact causing such health problems, but he says that medical research suggests that most of the problems reported in the survey are symptoms of chronic stress.

“The body reacts with a “fight-or-flight” response, releasing adrenaline and the stress hormone cortisol. That helps you react fast in an emergency, but if the body stays in this high gear too long, those chemicals can wreak physical havoc in numerous systems — everything from a rise in blood pressure and heart rate, to problems with memory, mood, digestion, even the immune system” says Lavrakas.

Cynthia Roberts, 36, of Tawas City, Mich., is “slowly crawling out of the hole that I’ve been buried in for four years.” Roberts lost her job due to health problems and couldn’t pay her mortgage, forcing her to do odd jobs like cleaning houses and hauling scrap metal to junkyards. Like many Americans, she had bills piling up and the stress was becoming unbearable. “I couldn’t function,” she remembers. “I’m surprised I’m not in a white straitjacket in a nut house. It was that bad. I had to go for counseling because I was freaking out.”

Hey America, we are all in the same boat here, but don’t give up! This economy has to turn around, and eventually it will, but in the meantime rest assured folks….you are not alone in your stress.

Ever noticed how the world has become so unfriendly? What ever happened to the “small town” attitude that people had towards one another, once upon a time, back when our parents were kids? The Gorilla’s parents often told stories (and the Gorilla even lived a few of them) about how warm and friendly people once were, when the world was a “different” place than it is now.

Although the age of technology has handed us a world of opportunities, conveniences, and the luxury of never having to wait, it has also made us a much colder, much more impersonal society. Just think, there was actually a time when you had to speak to a live person on the phone when calling any major corporation. Nowadays, it is actually shocking when a human voice answers the call. And at the airport, you can check in electronically and you never have to speak to one of those perky reservationists at all.

Or how about the electronic checkout systems that many stores now offer? Those nifty little things make it so convenient, so impersonal. No more “Hi Mr. Smith” or “Hello Mrs. Jones, how are the kids?” No sir.  Just a machine with a cold robotic voice to scan your items and check you out. When the Gorilla was in the city last week, he tried to make eye contact with many people on the streets, but shockingly, not one person would have anything to do with it. Each and every person completely avoided the Gorilla’s smile. Now, granted, people get very intimidated by the sight of a big hairy ape walking down the city streets, and many people stared from afar, but not one person would make direct eye contact.

And at the grocery store the other day, the Gorilla noticed the very same thing; everyone seemed to be walking with their heads down, making little or no eye contact, and looking for the most part, well… angry. On occasion, you would hear a friendly conversation between those who knew each other, but mostly, people are quiet and reserved, and keep to themselves. Quite a different scene from those cozy Norman Rockwell pictures.

On the city streets, many people are engrossed in their Blackberry as a way to avoid making eye contact and some are truly busy and just don’t notice what’s going on around them enough to ever make eye contact. It seems we have all been so conditioned to this new colder way of doing things, that we have literally forgotten our social skills and have become unfamiliar and even uncomfortable with even the notion of being social at all. The Gorilla is a very social guy and will never stop saying “hello” to strangers and striking up a friendly conversation with the guy in front of him at the deli- even at the risk of seeming a bit like a loon.

You see the truth is, people want to like you, they just don’t know what to do when they are actually spoken to by a complete stranger. (Ere’ go that lack of social skills the Gorilla mentioned earlier). So what is wrong with us? Have we all been fitted with devices that make everything go so much faster, that we just don’t want to “take the time” to be social? After all- the whole concept of having cell phones, Blackberrys, and the like, is to make life move along more quickly so the whole idea of “taking time” to be social with others seems a tad contradictory now doesn’t it?

So how will this society’s current lack of social skills affect our children? Go to any function with kids, or simply observe children playing in any school yard, and you will see how uninhibited they are towards one another. There is little or no awkwardness in their talk. Frequently, small children will make random conversation with just about anyone who will listen; never fearing the outcome or worrying about what the other child will think of them. They are kind, friendly, warm and interesting. We should take a cue from them- not let our own coldness and fear of contact make them cold, unfriendly, and unapproachable like we have become.

So what’s a wired up, always connected, always in a hurry, society to do to? Can we ever warm up again? Can we ever actually have a friendly conversation with the guy at the meat counter, without thinking he/she is a lunatic simply because they reached out for that natural human contact? Well, that is the question for the ages. The only way to know for sure is to actually look around. Hold your head up instead of down allowing others to actually see your face. Make eye contact with people. And hey, here’s a concept….smile why don’t ya? The world is a funny place, filled with people who are mostly just busy and sometimes afraid just like you. But for the most part, we all want to reach out and be reached out to. Why not put down the Blackberry or cell phone when you’re out and try some human-to-human contact? Hey, you might be surprised to feel a “connection” that you never knew you could feel without actually being “connected!”

Blackberrys, cell phones, video games; we’re always so wired in this world. Besides the obvious annoyances they bring- distractions, ADHA-like behavior, your spouse never paying attention to a word you say…they can also cause more serious problems. That’s because regularly texting, playing video games, or holding a cell phone to you ear can actually cause overuse injuries.
 
Doctors say taking even a one day break from using these devices can be good for your health. Overuse injuries occur when we repeat a motion so often that the body doesn’t have a chance to recover,” says John Fernandez, MD, a hand and wrist surgeon at Rush University Medical Center. Each year, Fernandez and his colleagues see people with conditions, such as Blackberry thumb, also called trigger thumb, which can cause swelling and a painful popping or snapping in the joint. Doctors are also seeing a lot of Wii elbow or tennis elbow caused by overuse of video games, which are interactive, such as the Nintendo Wii.
 
In severe cases, pain and swelling from this condition can restrict even simple motions of the elbow. Another common condition called cell phone elbow causes pressure on the nerve in the elbow from the constant flexing needed to hold a cell phone to the ear. It may sound ridiculous, but the result can be pain, numbness, tingling in the fingers, and hand weakness. This condition often leads to the need for physical therapy and sometimes even minor surgery in some patients.
 
So what’s the solution? Doctors say there are simple ways to prevent the inevitability of developing these conditions. To start, they say limiting the use of a blackberry to less than 3 minutes at a times can significantly reduce the chance of getting blackberry thumb or trigger thumb. Limit the playing time on video games and take frequent breaks to stretch. And as for the cell phone, how bout’ getting a hands-free device instead of holding the phone to your ear?
 
Well, most of these solutions are somewhat obvious of you ask this Gorilla, but some people just never learn!  Quit overusing the darn cell phone, blackberry, and those silly (albeit fun as heck) video games. It’s not exactly rocket science people!

During these tough economic times, city agencies and homeless advocacy groups are reporting the most visible rise in homeless encampments in a generation. From the overpass bridges in downtown Miami, FL, to the outskirts of town in Reno, Nevada, more and more tents are popping up, pitched by men and women with nowhere to go for the summer. Most homeless shelters- open during winter months- are often closed for the summer months, forcing those that count on them, to live in the streets, under bridges and by railroad tracks.

If you drive along the outskirts of most major cities, you will see them. They are the victims of an ailing economy; people who lost their jobs, then their homes, and with no income, they had no choice. According to a report by the National Coalition for the Homeless, nearly 61% of local and state homeless coalitions say they’ve experienced a rise in homelessness since the foreclosure crisis began in 2007. And since that report was released in April, the group says that the situation has actually worsened. “It’s clear that poverty and homelessness have increased,” said Michael Stoops, acting executive director of the coalition. “The economy is in chaos. We’re in an unofficial recession and Americans are worried, from the homeless to the middle class, about their future.”

Advocacy groups say they are shocked at how quickly the “tent cities” have cropped up all over the nation. It is certainly a national crisis. “What you’re seeing is encampments that I haven’t seen since the 80s,” said Paul Boden, executive director of the Western Regional Advocacy Project, an umbrella group for homeless advocacy organizations in Los Angeles, San Francisco, Oakland, Calif., Portland, and Seattle.

So what are cities doing to help the homeless? Some cities like Santa Barbara, California, have offered several parking lots to those who need to sleep in their cars, and in places like Portland, Oregon, and Seattle, advocacy groups there are helping those living in the tent cities by attending to their needs with food, clothing, and necessities. In the past, some cities would order the tent cities to be torn down, but due to the fragile economic times, and full shelters, they no longer try to move those who have no other options.

Other cities that tent encampments have been popping up in include Chattanooga, San Diego, and Columbus. The Gorilla knows that many people- almost everyone in this country are suffering in some way due to the current state of our economy, but most of us are fortunately, not homeless. Each and every one of us can help someone less fortunate- even if it’s just a meal or a good night’s sleep at a local shelter. If you would like to help, visit www.doe.org to get more information on how you can help.

Gotta hit song? Wanna showcase it for all of the world to see? Then just try it out on You Tube. You Tube is a growing venue, which lets the public see just what an artist has to offer, and the fever is spreading like wildfire all across the Internet.

Most of you have been to You Tube (unless you are living under a rock), so you pretty much know how it works; record a video or song and upload it for the whole world to see. No one ever said they had to be good, and yes, there are some truly awful ones out there. But still, it’s a great opportunity for those of us who love music to search for new stuff or even record and upload our own unique talents-if any (cough cough). Don’t laugh. People really seem to like Gorillas for some reason!

But seriously, many well-known artists like Taylor Swift are using You Tube to introduce new music to the public and she has had tremendous success doing so. “It’s like having another video,” said Swift, 18. “For me, it’s a chance to see someone else’s take on my music. I embrace that, and think it’s cool.” And, apparently, so do many other artists as well.

With millions of views per day, it’s not difficult to see why artists benefit from placing their music on the site. It’s a low-cost way for artists to create a buzz and get people interested, prior to releasing new music. “You can do mass advertising for every song through one click,” gospel artist Tye Tribbett said. He and his choir, “Greater Anointing,” have had their songs posted on You Tube and have found great success in doing so, thriving on the billboard gospel music charts with their album, “Stand Out,” this year.

Although some artists initially complained that their music was uploaded to You Tube without their knowledge and prior to some release dates, most now admit that it just creates more of a hunger for the music so that when it is finally released, people are clamoring to get it, causing record sales to go crazy in some cases. So what does everyone think of a singing and dancing gorilla doing his thing on You Tube? He could sing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” or how bout’ “Jungle Fever?”  Yeah…maybe not, but it’s sure fun to think about!

The political landscape looks pretty confusing to some nowadays, and America is hanging on literally every word our presidential hopefuls and their running mates say, and watching closely every move they make. It’s so reminiscent of that famous song by the Police, it’s a little disconcerting.

Think of all the questions we all have. People are wondering many different things like: Can a woman with a large family (including an infant with Down’s Syndrome), such as Sarah Palin’s, really take a seat next to the President of the United States? And can a black man vying for the Presidency of The United States handle the possibility of death threats against his life simply because of the color of his skin? Is he experienced enough? Can he handle the nation’s armed forces and take on our current foreign policies? And what of McCain? Does he possess the ability to be a well-rounded leader and not just a good military president? And what about Joe Biden?  Hardly anyone is talking much about him. He seems to be the invisible running mate these days. (With all of the attention on Sarah Palin, people seem to have forgotten poor Joe!)  It’s all a bit overwhelming.

The Gorilla has spoken to people from all walks of life, races, religions, and creeds, who were voting one way, and now cannot make up their minds. It is interesting to watch it all playing out, but with less than 60 days to go…the bumpy ride is just beginning. Even many celebrities are having their “say” about the candidates. Many have blasted Sarah Palin. It seems that in Hollywood the “popular” choice is Obama, and with people like Oprah Winfrey backing him, it’s not that surprising. But do we want a president that is popular in Hollywood? Hey, it worked for Arnold Schwarzenegger. But then again he isn’t running for President.

Yes, these are confusing times and the indecision seems to be wearing on the already fragile economy.  Will our newly elected President wow us by sparking this miserable economy? Will he help lower gas prices? Will he begin pulling forces out of Iraq? This is perhaps one of the most colorful (no pun intended) presidential elections in our country’s history. Never before has a man of color or a woman been so close to the White House. Time is running out for those who haven’t yet registered to vote, so get going! No matter who ends up as the President of our great United States, it is fun and exciting to be involved and vote! It is our civil responsibility, but mostly…who wants to miss out on one of the most exciting elections in history?