GorillaOffTopic, Everything But Gorilla Trades

New York, like so many other states, is in debt. How in debt are they? Well how about $4.4 billion to be exact! That’s a lot of debt to pay off, so how then does one go about doing that exactly? Governor Eliot Spitzer has a plan, and actually, it’s a pretty good one if you ask the Gorilla. The Governor plans to creatively re-define flavored alcoholic beverages -such as Mike’s Hard Lemonade and Smirnoff Ice- calling them liquor instead of beer, and re-defining little cigars, as cigarettes, thus increasing tax revenue to the state. Clever? Perhaps, but certainly nothing new as far as creativeness goes. States have been “creatively” inventing taxes for years when tough economic times have called for it.

Don’t believe the Gorilla? Just listen to these bizarre tactics; Some states tax the sale of pumpkins during Halloween, and some states even tax Shaquille O’Neal and Barry Bonds when they visit, using a “jock tax” on professional athletic events. Sounds crazy, doesn’t it? But, wait, that’s not all! There are even several states that tax exotic dancing calling it (amusingly) a “pole” tax. They range from the outright crazy to the absolutely insane,” said Nate Bailey, of the nonpartisan Tax Foundation based in Washington. “People at the local level already feel over-taxed and politicians, in a somewhat spineless way, look for a hidden way to increase revenue without raising taxes.”   

New York is also proposing an odd, but innovative tax on illegal drugs. It seems like a win-win when you think about the fact that you don’t have to fight off lobbyists or wage a political war in order for the state to collect a big payment right? Well, yes and no. You see, politicians seem to like these methods because they don’t have to raise income taxes, but on the other hand, many critics say that is a danger because long-term problems end up never getting fixed, and more important issues such, as healthcare and education go wanting.

While states don’t necessarily want that to happen, it won’t keep them from creating new and different methods for raising income. So, what’s the answer? Unfortunately, few methods will be without issue or controversy, but whatever the tactic, if it pays off the debt, does that make it more palatable? Well, that is for you, the taxpayer, to decide. All the Gorilla knows is that, if they start taxing the sunbathers in Florida, where he lives, that will be the last straw! (Hey, it could happen - you never know!)