GorillaOffTopic, Everything But Gorilla Trades

Cutbacks are a reality in the airline industry now, and if you haven’t flown in a while, you are bound to be shocked by how severe the cutbacks have become.  To start with, airlines have been offering fewer flights to destinations like the Caribbean and many other international destinations as well, making it difficult on those who travel internationally or just want to take a vacation. And not to state the obvious, but the rising fuel costs have forced airlines to now charge more money per ticket and to charge for things that were once complimentary as well.  Most airlines have been charging for those once complimentary meals for years now so that isn’t exactly anything new but now, you can’t even get a pack of peanuts for free! Nice. Absolutely nothing is free on an airplane any longer, which is just plain rude! It’s bad enough that some airlines are now charging bag fees (meaning to check in a bag or more than one in some cases), but that is not even the worst of it. And how about this story from the Gorilla’s recent travel log: Okay, so as much as the Gorilla travels, he certainly gets why the airlines must save money, he really does- but his latest travel experience just took the cake for him.  A Gorilla can take a lot of things. He can handle the charges for the various meals, blankets, and even headphones. He can handle no pillows on an overnight flight (true story- they simply weren’t available to coach passengers), and how about the attitude of the flight attendants themselves? Have you noticed lately just how hostile they are? Yes, a Gorilla can even handle that. But what he fails to comprehend is how, when all of the beverage services were completed, and everyone was seemingly asleep, there were absolutely NO lights on whatsoever in the cockpit. None! Not even the normally lit running lights (or exit light) down the aisles! The airplane went completely pitch (and he means pitch) black inside. Now save a few iPods and computer screens going on and off intermittently, there were NO lights to speak of.  Yes, the Gorilla let out a very audible “hmm” for his neighbors to hear with the realization that he now had to use the little Gorilla lavatory in the back of the plane. ”How hard could it be to find his way up and down an isle,” he thought. After all, it was a straight run.” Well to put it lightly, on the way to the lavatory, the Gorilla stepped on two different passengers’ feet (which were only slightly in the aisle), accidentally pulled a woman’s hair as he felt for the seatbacks to help him maneuver, and could not find his way back to his own seat on the trip back.(Humiliating). He actually had to head back to the rear of the plane and ask for help from one of the flight attendants, who himself carried a flashlight. How nice for him!  But to make it so that passengers must feel there way in the dark or count seat numbers on the way back to their seats from the bathroom is simply too much to ask of any passenger. It is simply not fair. The Gorilla could easily see someone falling and hurting themselves or another, while the airlines continue to overlook this potentially dangerous (but mostly embarrassing) cost-saving method. If a passenger sues them, which is not that unlikely, they are going to have a lot more to worry about than the few bucks they are saving on aisle lights.  

The Gorilla’s advice: Well you can’t beat the system. Unfortunately air travel is just not all that fun these days so there is nothing one can really do about it but be prepared. Oh, and btw… a flashlight might not be a bad idea if you are taking the redeye!